Thursday, February 7, 2008
haven't been here for a pretty long time. several things have happened over the past few weeks and i think it's about time to catch up with them before moving on to new things.
but my severe toothache is causing a mental blockage. which leads to the first thing in my mind now... I have just put on my braces! It's been quite a long drawn affair since last year when i requested to put it on to straighten my teeth but more importantly, improve my speech abilities (I tend to slur and stumble on my words). my parents, perhaps due to financial concerns or other reasons, have repeatedly shunned the topic whenever i brought it up. even now, they still seem to hold some reservations whenever i spoke about it. I reckon it's the finances that they're having concerns about, but i think i have acted responsibly enough by asking them if they were comfortable with me doing my treatment now (i.e are they able to pay the money etc.). Despite doing so, my dad showed little opposition towards my intention, and therefore i proceeded with my plan. Afterall we're sharing costs(i'll pay for the treatment every alternate month), and i'm giving them all my angbao money for the treatment. So...i don't think i'm being selfish or what either.
the other significant event took place last saturday...the TH CNY carnival. the event inadvertently provoked some thoughts. the event turned out well in the end, despite various screw-ups during the course of the programme. from my perspective, these unfortunate happenings occured because there was no one to take charge. Yes, I was the co-chair of the event, but that didn't give me enough authority, especially moral ones, to command and steer the entire team. there were numerous time when i found myself eager to take charge but withdrew because i was the vice-chair, not the chair. i don't know if this is a result of the army culture, where if you're someone lower in rank, all you need to do is to listen and do. Or, in a environment where all are equal in rank, the more you take charge, the more likely you'll be labelled as the indian chief. what do you do in this position?
motivated to do better the next time, i accepted the request to join the MYG family day committee. i think it'll be a good learning experience anyhow, despite the fact i'll be very busy and will have less time to spend with
dear.
recently my mum's been getting quite cranky, getting at me quite often for no good reason. i presume she has been feeling quite upset that i haven't been home too often for the past few months, but i hope she understands that i haven't been out to look for fun or get myself into trouble, but rather to do work, volunteer and of course spend time with
dear. furthermore, at this age, i don't expect myself to stay home for long everyday. i should be out there carving out new experiences, isn't it?
disturbed you at 12:35 AM