Saturday, April 5, 2008
i guess it sounds kinda silly or ninny for a guy to tear on the buses/trains because there was nobody to accompany him that particular day (and this replicates every single day in the future), but i'm just like that and i couldn't really help it.
i'll reveal the dark side of me: down in the airport i had wanted people to see the tears. i'd have welcomed whispers by my side saying, "he looks like he's crying. he must be real sad. poor thing.' attention seeking ploys, in a nutshell. but i tottered away in silence before anyone could notice anything. nobody i wanted to see followed. nobody said a thing. the ploy failed. i went back to my little dark corner in the well, waiting for light to shine in sometime someday.
it's 45 min past 9.30pm. i am still waiting. to forget i need to keep myself busy, but once i have started waiting i am only satisfied when i get what i want.
sheer melodrama, you might say, but that's how it's like for me.
disturbed you at 9:55 PM